I’m watching a trickle of colourful umbrellas bring some colour into this otherwise grey morning. I’ve taken myself out for some cappuccino, because the smells and sounds make me feel less homesick.
I’ve managed to procrastinate this morning by spending a substantial amount of time trying to translate a song into English, just to eventually give up in frustration. I’ve spent the last year trying to translate a lot of songs. More than I can ever sing.
I’ve spent my life in translation - trying to translate my feelings and experiences into something the world around me might understand.
And at some stage, when this started to feel unsafe, to encode this translation, translate it into something people might not understand.
And now I find myself lost in translation.
Perhaps my life will always be defined by this struggle - the push and pull of trying to both protect and express who I am.
I use my words like umbrellas - to keep the rain at bay, while trying to show my colours.